Distance Relationship: Rules and Experiences
Erasmus, travels or experiences abroad are great opportunities to meet new people; often happens if the stay is only a few days, there are frequentations about women because several are observing us. This can bring some pleasant surprises, but sooner or later, you or your partner will be arriving to a decision of returning home, in any cases of your stay at the place where you met.
Big problem. In the vast majority of cases here everything is “quit”. It was just a brief flirting story and that’s fine. In the worst (or better, depend the viewpoint) cases, you opened a window on women or men of cultures or countries maybe even very different from yours. And that’s very good.
There are minor, but very important cases, where it is really hard on both sides to believe that it was all a game or some. And then we try to continue despite hundreds of thousands of miles that separate us from our partner, starting a relationship named distant relationship.
Let’s just say something: if you feel that jealousy is an important component of the relationship, let it go. Do not even try. Know that it would be an immense suffering for you, and I would especially mean about control maniacs. The disaster is practically insured, put it in the head; jealousy and doubt, has not placed in distant relations, simply because, for example, if you live in Rome and she lives in Helsinki, you or her can do anything. And it’s not for everyone. Especially in the era of social networks.
And to avoid misunderstanding, if you are part of those people who want or really need sometimes physical to always feel or at least often close to the partner, also let it go because you would suffer so much. And for nothing, since at some point you have to close everything because you cannot bear it anymore. Here, too is a disaster insured.
Now that we have established that distant relationships are not for everyone, let’s start by saying your partner is able to find a method to do everything to avoid physical separation; you have to know that you’re going to live something important. It looks obvious, but a distant love is strong and it must be so.
So let’s start with a good news: you have been able to establish a strong relationship with a person who grew up in a context different from yours, accustomed to wanting and estimating things different of yours. And, certainly not secondary, you have found a person who shares this and is ready to sacrifice (or at least initially accepts the idea) not to finish what you have started. Well, this is marvellous, but as soon as the miles begin to be many, you will need a lot of strength, believe me.
Distant relationships are not for weak persons or for those who live relationships superficially for at least three reasons:
1. NO JEALOUSY in distance relationships. As mentioned, it is not for everyone! This requires both to be people of great independence and strength, capable of throwing away any negative thoughts or jealousy and building a feeling of substitution, the “trust”. Indispensable component in the distant relationship which of course will have to be mutual, bilateral. Be careful to make something wrong; You may lose a person’s trust and an important relationship. Remember that social networks are very dangerous nowadays.
2. USE FANTASY. No strange things, but in such anomalous relationships, distant relationships need to be shaken. Sometimes, loneliness will weigh a lot but instead of depressing yourself make a surprise because your partner is very likely to experience the same things. Make use of his/her relatives or friends if you’ve had the urge to take them to your side. Try to do the same thing at the same time, technology helps it so much; Or arrange a weekend at some location that you know your partner likes, maybe half way. Obviously, all are in surprise. In short, if you want to survive, your partner will have to perceived your relationship as special and unique. Be very careful about what is said and done, the information you will unknowingly get will be useful for future initiatives.
3. THE END OF THE TUNNEL. Even if you were both very mature and autonomous people, you have to make a limit to such relationship; in the long time, one gets tired. In short, you need a project where you, two, get rejoin and a time limit. This will give you a twofold advantages: first, you will understand how important the relationship is to your partner. Second, you will see at the end of a relationship that even at best, is quite complex, and this will help you feel less weight. In the meantime, put agenda the next time you will see each other. This also helps a lot.
Distance Relationships are not for everyone, even to those who have never tried should have understood it and can overcome the great difficulties these often give; often will get something very precious. Really, strong relationships which have known as difficulty of the distance, of solitude and have survived often for long periods. In short, it is very hard but at least and hoping to be rewarded..
P.S. Alright, at this point you want to ask, “How will it end? … I find it to be the right question; we live together and have a beautiful baby for a few months.
IN Attraction Staff